Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Contacting the good Congressman

Today, I contacted Rep. Sam Graves via both e-mail and a cordial phone call concerning the Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevent Act/The Matthew Shepard Act which goes up for a vote tomorrow. Here's what I had to say.

"Congressman Graves, thank you for taking the time to listen to your constituents. I’m contacting you today to urge you to vote yes on the Hate Crimes Bill, also known as the Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevent Act/The Matthew Shepard Act.

I want you to understand that my support of this bill is not a knee-jerk reaction to support anything that is in the pro-gay agenda. I do understand the objection.

Those opposed to this bill will say that when we start punishing criminals based on what was going through their minds, there are first amendment issues at stake.

And believe me, their point isn’t entirely without merit.

As a free speech junkie, I’ve thought long and hard about this argument and I have nevertheless come to this conclusion: Murder and assault are not forms of speech.

We take motive into account every day in our courtrooms because our legal system understands that some people are more likely to kill, maim or assault again while some are not. A thrill-killer or serial killer is a greater danger to society than say, someone who has decided to take the law into their own hands and exact justice on someone who has hurt someone they love.

Both absolutely deserve to be punished, but my point is that we do take motive into account because some people are more likely to continue to be a danger to society than others.

People who commit hate crimes fall into the category of those who will most likely strike again. When one’s motives are hate and sadism, yes, they are more dangerous than other criminals.

So please, Congressman, as one of your constituents, granted one who is most likely to disagree with you on most issues, please vote yes on the Federal Hate Crimes Bill.

Again Congressman, thank you for listening. I hope you make the right decision tomorrow."


Considering his associations, I doubt he'll vote our way, but that does not excuse us from trying to get through to these people.

Anybody who's reading this, please, e-mail and/or call your Representative and ask them to vote yes on the Hate Crimes Bill.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

The Leader of the She-Males


Sleep Sweet, Gentle Trainie.

New Catch Phrase

Okay, I'm trying to think of a catch phrase.

I was thinking about 'Fuck your mother,' but it's not really original, is it? And, someone pointed out to me that it might come across as a little combative and that's the last thing I'd want.

I was thinking maybe just 'Say hi to your mom for me.'

But there's no swears in that and I really like swears.

Maybe 'Jesus hates you.'


I'll think about it some more and get back to you.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Fuck Your Tea Party and Fuck You Part Deux

I really want to avoid overstatements here because I think this shit is important and I want those of you who disagree with me to finish reading this. So, I’m going out of my way not to alienate anybody.

So, this post is brought to you with a limited amount of swears.

Aside from the ones in the title. I have some restraint, but I’m not Jesus.

And aside from my taking a quick moment here to reaffirm that I firmly stand by my characterization of Rick Santelli as a ginormous fucktard of a walking abortion.

I’d also like to reiterate my call for help on spelling the non-word ‘ginormous.’

Little help?

Here’s the thing. I really didn’t hear anybody calling the Tea Party protestors on April 15th on their shit.

Where to begin?

Okay, I’ll just choose a random jumping-off point.

Um, this is not at all in the spirit of the Boston Tea Party.


First off, that was not an attention-grabbing gimmick.

Second, that was about taxation without representation. Whereas President Obama was elected with a mandate.

And boy is he ever representing.


These things that he’s doing that you have such a big problem with, they are nothing more than the promises he ran on.


We the people chose a President who said that he was going to increase taxes on the upper class and corporate America and give the lower class a break.


You can call it socialism if you like, (and believe me, I do like) but it is what we voted for.


As an aside, I have to say that watching these people meltdown, throwing tantrums in their impotence isn't just gratifying. It's actually good for your soul.


Some restriction has to be put over the unbridled, hedonistic capitalism that started this whole mess we’re in.


So exactly why Obama isn't just doing exactly what we asked him to.


Now on to the underlying racism found at some of these protests.


The worst sign I saw was from one of the tea parties here in Kansas City. I’ve been trying to locate an image of it on the web for a few days now, but I can’t find one.


Basically, it’s a caricature of Obama with gigantic, exaggerated lips over a banner that says, “Beware of Dog.”


You’d think that the racism of the twenty-first century would be a little more subtle than that. Here are some of the other signs from these rallies.


“Obama’s Plan White Slavery.”

“The American Taxpayers are the Jews for Obama’s Ovens.”


“Our Tax $ given to Hamas to kill Christians, Jews and Americans.”

This might be my favorite, given the irony of insinuating that Obama is giving aide and comfort to our enemies and overlooking Bush’s close, intimate, almost homo-erotic relationship with the Saudi Royal Family.


“Obama. What you talkin’ about, Willis!”

And let’s not forget the calls for the lynchin’ of Obama’s allies.


Now am I trying to say that everyone involved in these tea parties are racist? No, but I am saying that none of them seem to be going out of their way to condemn the fringe wackos.

The Young Turks posted an exceptionally enlightening rant about the tea-bagging protestors and their rhetoric.

To sum up, speaking up about this president scant months after you were screaming that anyone who opposed YOUR President hated America and wanted to offer comfort and aid to our enemies sounds disingenuous to say the least.


Has it been so long that we've forgotten what actual tyranny looks like? It's been like three months for Christ's sake.

To those of you who’ve been talking about the erosion of our liberties and about tyranny, why don’t you come back after the biggest country music group in America is banned from the radio pretty much all around the country and has their career wrecked because they criticized Obama.

Until that happens, sit the fuck down and wait your turn, which thankfully is like 19 months away.

As long as we don’t listen to the right, and why would we, since they’re in the minority, we can make a pretty good chunk of our agenda a reality in 19 months.


Yes, we can.

The Cowardice of Anonymity

There is a legend of a website where you can say anything under the cloak of anonymity.

Every person who uses this website to air their grievances deserves zero respect.

I truly believe that anybody who has something to say ought to have the balls to say it instead of hiding under an anonymous screen identity like a pussy.

So, here’s my promise. Anything I say will be accompanied by my picture and my name.

Like this.

People who bitch and vent and whine with the impunity that anonymity provides are pussies. If you post on that website, you know which one I'm talking about, that means you.


Joshua David Lucht

Had to be said. Thank you for caring and/or listening.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

For once, I'm speechless

I'm not savvy enough to put one of those thumbnail thingies on my page, so here is the link to a devastating story.


Monday, April 13, 2009

Concealing intelligence




So here's my idea. State Representative, at least in Missouri and Kansas, must be required to wear helmets at all times and must have oven mitts duct-taped securely over both hands. They have stenographers, etc. taking notes, so they really don't need (or deserve) the dexterity given to us through our opposable thumbs. Remember, evolving is a privilege, not a right.



Also, seriously, no more cousin-fucking. No matter how bangable your cousins may be. Clearly, it doesn't produce the kind of leaders the world of tomorrow will require.

Let’s go to the state House in Jefferson City, MO, where according to an AP story by Chris Blank, last Wednesday, April the 8th, legislation that would lower the age required to obtain a conceal and carry permit from 23 to 21 years old and lift the ban on concealed weapons at public colleges and universities received initial house approval.

Of course, people who actually spend time inside our wonderful, progressive Missouri academic institutions are scared fuck-dickless by the idea. Gary Forsee, the University of Missouri system President is concerned that such a measure would "increases the risk that our university family could be put in harm's way."


Photo courtesy Missouri Digest News


Of course, this isn’t going to stand in Missouri State Representative Brian Munzlinger’s way. For those of you who don’t know, Munzlinger is the cunting-fucked-up-in-every-twat-ass-way-my-Christ-I-bet-even-Jesus-himself-hates-this-guy, lead supporter of this bill.


But I must concede that he does have a very manly beard. I don't mind telling you, I'm a little turned on right now.


He said, (I’m paraphrasing) that people who were thinking about steppin’ and doin’ shit wouldn’t do shit if they thought someone might have a concealed gun and stop them.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?

Those of you who know me know that I do listen to conservative talk radio from time to time in my car. I believe that knowing what the enemy is saying is critical.


I remember the day of the Virginia Tech massacre, I was driving around and Neal Boortz was saying (and again, I’m paraphrasing) that this whole tragedy could have been averted if only someone on campus was packing a gun.


See, then they could’ve shot the bad guy and saved the day. See how that works?

Christ, people are stupid. But, hell, that’s part of what makes this country great. Fucktards can say anything they want with impunity and I wouldn’t have it any other way.


It’s the same freedom that lets me call Neal Boortz a fucktard. It actually makes me feel kinda warm inside.

However, when like-minded fucktards… Hold on, I’ve already used fucktard twice. Let me come up with something else….

Dipshit, too common and boring. Fuckhead is too close to fucktard and so is fuckface for that matter.

Cunnie-juice brained fuckos. No, that wouldn’t be fair to fuckos and besides, cunnie-juice is one of my favorite things.

Wait.




Greinke. Perfecto.





When like-minded Greinkes manage to stumble into any kind of legislature, it’s time to panic.

Maybe the smarties outnumber the Greinkes. We can only hold our breath and wait to see what happens when the State House and Senate actually vote on this.

That is if they can manage to not drool all over themselves first.

In a completely unrelated story, on April 3, 2009, Jiverly Wong used a 9 mm and .45-caliber handgun to kill 13 people at the American Civic Association building in Binghamton, NY.


According to Deborah Hastings, AP National Writer, earlier that day, Wong mailed an envelope to a Syracuse television station.


Inside was his gun permit along with pics of his jolly smile, holding his shiny, candy-like guns, and his driver's license.

The gun permit was issued to Wong in 1997. Two years later, police were tipped off that he was planning to rob a bank so he could buy crack. (I swear to fuck, I am not making this shit up.)

And still, the right to bear arms was not taken from him. That’s awesome.


I wonder who actually did have the honor of taking the gun out of his cold, dead hands.


Saturday, April 11, 2009

A Quotable Socialist


"It is the deed that teaches, not the name we give it. Murder and capital punishment are not opposites that cancel one another, but similars that breed their kind."

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Healing up now

Okay, I just got back from the hospital because I had to have my dick reattached because earlier I saw a 'Palin 2012' bumper sticker and I laughed it off.