Monday, May 25, 2009

Good Material - Bad Movies (When I am Elected God Part III)

I just found out that Gore Verbinski will be directing the film version of Bioshock. This is horrible news.

How is it that they can't hire good directors for beloved books, plays, musicals, video games etc.

So when I am elected God, Verbinski will be joining Chris Columbus and Joel Schumacher on the list of filmmakers who will be sentenced to twenty years hard sodomizing without the possibility of parole or lube for the crime of ruining beloved works like Harry Potter, Phantom and now Bioshock.

(Dude, your lair is in a basement. Where the Christ did you get a horse and a gondola?)

Michael Bay, Transformers was just good enough to keep you off this list but it's going to take much more than that to take the taste of Pearl Harbor out of our mouths. Consider yourself on notice.

Now all of you, stop ruining shit I like.

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